


sun and moon (the heavenly chorus edition)

by callixto



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Drabble Collection, Ensemble Cast, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-04
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-28 08:46:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10082033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/callixto/pseuds/callixto
Summary: [an asurei drabble collection for cheer-up gifts to my asuka, updated eventually. summary for each drabble in respective notes].





	1. happy birthday, lonely girl (birthday kisses, 373 words)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [reshirama](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reshirama/gifts).



> kiss to grow an inch (or maybe a spine). late birthday drabble, posted even later; background kawoshin.

If Asuka’s not used to kindness, it shouldn’t be a surprise. She’s been through too much for that, cut herself open on glass and harsh words and (if even her own mother didn’t love her, how would anyone else?); the closest thing to kindness she’s had she’s always, always ruined.

She doesn’t expect anyone to acknowledge her birthday at all. Why would anyone care about Asuka for anything beyond her skill as a pilot, as one of their precious _saviours_?

When she walks into the apartment she’s forced to share with Misato and Shinji and that stupid bird, the surprise she feels at the people gathered into it hits like a slap in the face. Even Kaji is there, smiling smugly and reaching out to ruffle her hair; Misato and Ritsuko sniping at each other as usual and half-smiling at each other and her (Ayanami sitting calmly in a corner, ignoring the kerfuffle and Kaworu and Shinji being as sickly sweet as usual, Kaworu kissing bits of frosting off of Shinji’s hands. Asuka pushes down her immediate rush of jealousy, forcing her eyes away from Ayanami, and brings a cat-like smile to her face. It’s forced, but it shows.).

It’s so much already, just this, these people who say they care about her – and she could almost believe it, for today, her smile turning real and bright and the venom usually present draining out of it – and once it’s over, the lights turning out and everyone leaving, she breathes out a sigh of relaxation. A smile tugs at her lips, true and sweet, and she barely jumps when Ayanami steps into her shadow from the corner Asuka had thought she’d left.

Reaches out a pale hand, laying it on Asuka’s cheek with utter calm to lean in and press a kiss to chapped lips. “Happy birthday, Soryu-chan.”

Asuka splutters, pushes her back on impulse: “W-what?! It’s not New Year’s, you know! You don’t kiss people on their birthdays!” but she’s still smiling. Gives in easy enough when Ayanami tilts her head, bird-like in her confusion, to say,

“I was misinformed, then? Does that mean I can’t kiss you?” Pulls her close, and the affection is the best gift Asuka’s gotten today.


	2. helium balloons (dissociation cuddles, 174 words)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings for unreality and vaguely referenced past trauma.

Sometimes Rei gets like this, floaty and losing what little grasp on emotions she’s struggled towards, and Asuka can see Rei’s eyes go empty when she looks into them.

– she never quite knows what to do, though, even with how familiar it’s become. Asuka gets angry at what’s been done to her, lashes out and makes herself anew, and Rei’s gone the opposite way and become hollow. (she’s almost, almost scared that her emotions will scorch Rei out of existence, and she couldn’t stand that.)

When Rei gets like this, Asuka silences herself. Muffles her voice, goes soft and sweet around blank, doll-like Rei – as Asuka promised herself she wouldn’t be ever again, but they’re different, and if it hurts her to see Rei like that she just has to not say anything – and gives her a grounding presence as she stares into space.

It isn’t enough, won’t ever be enough; but Asuka can take care of her. They’ll take care of each other, and that’s closer to love than either of them have ever had.


	3. little miss perfect (hwbm au, 298 words)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so maybe asuka's a little obsessive. she'll be a real hero yet, though -- you just watch. canon-typical implied csa, written for femslash febuary jic.

It’s funny, Asuka thinks, that Rei of all people is _Cradle’s Graces’_ favored pilot. Optimism? Futurism? Making outer space suitable for humans??!?! Rei is barely human, as anyone can tell, and she certainly doesn’t think very positively.

Still, she puts up a good fight. More than anyone else, and that’s where they’re stuck - Asuka with these stupid, obsessive thoughts in her head, just waiting for every opportunity to smash her fist into Rei’s smug teeth and be praised for it.

They’re arch-enemies, you know! It’s excusable!

She likes to tell herself, adrenaline rushing through her and lighting up every nerve in her body and between her legs, that it’s just the fight. Mari makes her feel the same way! She’s been raised as Existential Safety’s best girl, their gem and warrior! Her job is, and always has been, to beat the shit out of the opposing factions’ stupid, whiny, pretty pilots.

At every diplomatic meeting, her heart starts to race. It’s battle-lust, rising in her sick as bile and blood - her cheeks flush, her fists clench. Rei looks as blank as ever sitting across the table, the Director’s hand on hers in an oddly possessive motion. It makes Asuka furious.

She knows better than anyone that Rei can throw a punch. She can defend herself, rip other mechs to shreds and keep that vague, blank smile. And yet Rei sits there, acting as nothing more than a doll for a creepy old man who talks about fighting, about humanity’s ‘evolution’, like suffering doesn’t matter and the ends justify the means.

In the end, that’s why Asuka wants to defeat their faction. She’ll tear them to shreds for Existential Safety, and sweep Rei off her feet. Grind her boots into Gendo’s ugly face, and be a hero for real.


End file.
